Thursday 22 October 2009

Day 9: Social Networking, Online, The Aspie Way

I've found myself strangely drawn to Twitter. I only joined a week ago. I joined initially to promote my blog. I guess I wanted people to read my blog to see if anyone else related to how I think. I wanted to write it all down so I could try and understand how ex couldn't just want me anymore. It's a question I push out of my head many times a day, I've shied away from writing it down in case it really hurts doing that. I was also worried writing it down may just increase the number of times it comes into my head, then is told to go away (in no uncertain terms.) So here goes:
Why didn't you want me anymore? Explain, why was I your soul mate the week before you finished it all, you said I was your best friend. There, done. I'm leaving that now. I've written it down and realise it's not going to help knowing the answers, she did try and tell me in that text, I don't want to read it again and anyway it really wont help, just move on.
Back to Twittering, (...no the social network.) As mentioned I joined to promote the blog, I posted links to the blog in the sections related to Aspergers. I wasn't going to follow any other tweeters, sheep follow and I was above that. That is until I started reading the posts. For those who don't know each Tweet is limited to 140 letters. It's amazing how much you can fit into 140 letters. So I've found myself not only offering snippets of Aspie advice to tweeters in the Aspie sections, but also checking frequently during the day to see whats going on in this little community.
I also 'do' Facebook. I don't really know why. I don't mention anything Aspie related on there. It's mainly work friends, that's a strange description 'work friends.' I work from home so non of them really know me at all, very few are privileged to know I'm an Aspie. I get slightly disheartened when I post something on Facebook and it gets largely ignored by the people listed as 'friends.' I think my younger brother (more about him another day) see's my posts, realises no one else has commented and makes a Facebook comment just so my post doesn't read 'zero comments.' This though has the effect of reminding me just how socially retarded I am.
I am aware I don't come across as an interesting person. I've never been able to keep up in conversations. Actually stop there ! That's no strictly true. I revert to comedy, generally playing the fool. Especially where there's alcohol involved, I'm able to come out of my shell when slightly inebriated, I wonder if that's the same for other Aspies. If I go past slightly inebriated I can even flirt and find I have the ability to chat up women, I do generally make a prize prat of myself but hey at least I had a go.

3 comments:

  1. I am pretty sure I am an Aspie just not diagnosed. I dont think I will bother with the diagnosis either , what for? so then the so called professionals have more to use against me ? no chance.
    So much in your post is me and my thoughts that it is a little bit creapy LOL.
    Anyway good post , I look forward to reading more and reading your tweets too so keep them coming !

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  2. Wow, I'm so glad to have found your blog. My son is an Aspie, I call him that on my site, and your thoughts give me such insight into what he's going through.

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  3. Writing stuff down is a good way to go. There's stuff that really does hurt. I came across a book by Pema Chodron called "Start Where You Are" which makes a lot of sense to me.

    I'm pretty sure I have Asperger's, but I only really started reading about it in the last couple of weeks or so. Glad I found your blog :-)

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